This essay is a plea for mutual listening and encouragement for individuals to defend their point of view without being constrained by groups and ideologies. At the same time, it is a small cultural history of well-intentioned usurpations. For example, volunteers who present refugees’ history as if it were their own. So-called strangers don’t just have enemies; sometimes they also have overprotective friends who turn them into needy exotics. A false understanding of solidarity and encroaching involvement can cause as much damage as populism or rampant conspiracy theories.